matching pair
by justjoy
Summary: Hattori Heiji is woken abruptly by the scream of a banshee. [...or not. for the prompt: "Can I at least put on my socks first?"]


**note to readers:** if you're on AO3, please consider following me there instead (same username, archiveofourown DOT org / users / justjoy) – fuller explanation on my profile page, but the rationale is basically that FFN is just... a real pain to use on many fronts, honestly. don't worry, I _will_ continue to post DCMK works here, it's just that I feel AO3 (and/or Tumblr, where I go by presumenothing if you're so inclined) provide much better user experiences for all of us, plus I'm usually far more responsive on these platforms as well – asks on Tumblr are your best bet if you want to reach me directly, and I've enabled anonymous asks so feel free to come say hi even if you don't have an account!

TL;DR – justjoy on AO3, presumenothing on Tumblr, come find me there. as always, thank you for your support, and hope you enjoy!

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for the prompt: "Can I at least put on my socks first?"

* * *

Hattori Heiji is woken abruptly by the scream of a banshee.

…okay, not really – though with the really _really_ weird run of cases he's had with Kudo recently (they've discussed this, and come to the conclusion that it is pretty unexplainable even by their standards, which is saying something), it isn't even a possibility that Heiji can dismiss out of hand anymore.

Anyway. It's still an accurate analogy, if you replace the banshee with his handphone, which is vibrating madly on the bedside table at… Heiji has no idea what time it even is, except for being _waaaay_ too early for anyone to be calling him.

He almost gives in to temptation to ignore it and go back to sleep (he _is_ quite capable of sleeping through worse things, after all), but after a full minute of insistent ringing Heiji reaches just far enough to drag the phone over and glance at the screen.

Which, _ow_ , because looking at a bright screen in a dark room isn't the greatest idea, apparently. (Look, he _knew_ that already, his brain just hasn't fully started up yet, okay?)

Eyes now watering, Heiji squints against the glare until he manages to make out the caller's name, which turns out to be… _Kazuha?_ he thinks, somewhat dumbfoundedly, because Kazuha of _all people_ should know that Heiji isn't a morning person by any definition of the phrase. Heck, even his _mum_ lets him sleep in on weekends, so why –

Heiji basically gives up on guessing at this point and accepts the call, then puts the phone on speaker for good measure before flipping it to face down.

"Moshi moshi," he mumbles with a vague attempt at coherence, though it's probably rendered useless by him burying his face back into the pillow, because – ah, glorious darkness, he could go to sleep again…

Kazuha promptly puts a stop to that. "Heiji? You have to get up now, quick!"

He makes several noises of complete disagreement at this, before straightening up enough to ask, "Why, did someone die?"

 _"Did someo–_ oh my god, Ran-chan's right, that's all you detectives ever think about, isn't it?" Kazuha's voice sounds kinda tinny over the speaker, Heiji notes absently. "No, it's not a case, do I sound like Otaki-keibu to you? Anyway, get dressed, or I'm coming over to drag you out of bed!"

Heiji sighs – he _knows_ that particular tone in Kazuha's voice, and it conjures the distinct possibility of a police cruiser arriving at his door in fifteen minutes if he doesn't get up right now.

"Is there any way I'm getting out of this?" he asks anyway, because he (unlike _certain_ detectives of the East) believes in being an optimist, and when that gets the expected negative response Heiji finally gives in and pushes himself upright with a yawn. "Fine, I'm up! But I'm gonna go right back to bed after this, because _some_ of us actually need sleep."

"You're just lazy, Heiji," Kazuha replies altogether too cheerfully. "I _know_ you wake up at five before tournaments, don't try to deny it. Now hurry up, if you're not out of the house in five minutes you're buying me lunch tomorrow!"

Heiji decides, wisely, to not point out the distinct lack of tournaments today. "Okay, jeez, can I at least put on my socks first?"

"Just don't bother with finding a matching pair. Your sock drawer is a mess, Heiji, I've _seen_ it," Kazuha says in a longsuffering tone – which Heiji kinda deserves, admittedly, but it's not like anyone cares about what socks he's wearing anyway.

She waits another three minutes – during which Hattori Heiji, champion of multiple kendo tournaments, manages to stub his toe on three separate pieces of furniture while attempting to get dressed because he _still refuses to turn on the light_ – before asking again. "Are you done yet?"

He picks up the phone from the bed and switches off the speaker. "Yeah, yeah, I'm heading out now. What's the big emergency about, anyway? You still haven't said."

"You'll see!" comes Kazuha's reply, and Heiji blinks in surprise, because she sounds _really excited_ all of a sudden.

(Or, some part of his brain suggests, she had been excited to start with and he just hadn't been awake enough to notice it?

Heiji stifles a yawn, conceding the point, and wonders briefly if Kudo ever had to suffer this kind of treatment. Granted, Neechan could punch through concrete, but he didn't think she was cruel enough to wake Kudo at – he checks his watch – three-thirty in the morning.)

He walks through the house on silent feet, thankfully avoiding any further unfortunate encounters with various pieces of furniture, before reaching the front door and changing out of his house slippers.

A cold draft blows in as he unlocks the door, and Heiji shivers, glad he'd managed to find a pair of socks anyway, despite Kazuha's lack of faith in his organisational systems.

The first impression he gets as he steps out into their front porch is that of blinding white, then – _wait_.

"Is it…" Heiji trails off, rubbing at his eyes in disbelief. "It _is_ snowing, isn't it."

"Yep!" Kazuha agrees enthusiastically over the phone. "And a really heavy snowfall, too, I can't remember the last time we had this much snow."

That was… huh, Heiji couldn't remember either. It certainly wasn't recent, at any rate.

Heiji contemplates the garden for a moment, as it slowly but steadily vanishes under the cover of white, and snaps a few pictures, because it _is_ quite pretty, he can agree about that much.

Then he puts the phone back to his ear. "Okay, I've seen it, so I'm going back in to sleep now."

 _"What?"_ Kazuha actually sounds offended, which he hadn't been aware could happen over the topic of weather. "No way!"

"Yes way," Heiji counters, already making his way back into the inviting warmth of the house. "A snow that thick will still be around when I actually wake up later. Besides, couldn't you have just asked me to look out the window, instead of dragging me all the way out here?"

"Where's the fun in that? And stop whining, you'll start sounding like an old man," Kazuha grumbles.

"Well," Heiji says as he reaches his room, "this old man would like to get some more sleep, so you have fun building snowmen or whatever it is you want to do. I'll put the snow chains on the bike later so we can go out in the afternoon."

"Fine, but I'm holding you to that, Heiji!" Kazuha says warningly.

"Yeah, okay." He yawns, and flops back gracelessly onto the bed. "See ya later, Kazuha."

She says something in response, but Heiji's already asleep before he hears it.

 _._

 _._

 _…hm. feeling a little iffy about this, to be honest – HeiKazu isn't a pairing I read particularly often, let alone write (ditto for Heiji himself too, actually), so tell me what you think?_

 _also apologies for any inaccurate depictions of weather ok the author hasn't actually experienced snow before lmao_


End file.
